I have a new project. In an effort to streamline my work schedule and give myself more leisure time, I’ve decided to capitalize on Seren-Kitty’s ability to read and write.

All cats know how to read. They simply sit on the page (or the E-reader), and absorb the text through their (ahem) nether regions. Just check out Wall-E, in the picture “reading” my first-aid book. Kitties want to be prepared. *s* What do YOUR cat’s read?

For years, I’ve explained to those who asked that Seren “edit” everything that leaves the house. Seren used to grab paper as it came out of the fax machine, and she answered my phone (but rarely took a message and left the receiver off the hook). Aside from simply channeling my inner cat (or dog, in the case of the forthcoming thriller), Seren takes it further. She types.

Purr-haps the next book will be mewsings straight from the Seren-kitty’s tail–er, tale. (Okay, I can hear the groans, so I’ll stop. For now.)

This is new for her. Oh, I’ve joked about Seren having a “paw-top computer” where she actually writes all of my books and articles, and allows me to take credit. After all, I have the thumbs and a wallet to open for all the kitty must-haves. But she’s never before bothered the computer keyboard, maybe because most of my work has been composed on an ergonomic keyboard.

Lately, though, I’ve worked quite a bit on my laptop. If I leave the thing open and unsupervised, she takes advantage to SIT on the keyboard–reading, I suppose, unless she’s type-composing with her ass-ets. Heck, some of my work may resemble that but I assure you, the typing does take place.

If you’re a writer who often angsts over composing just the RIGHT phraseology, having it wiped out by kitty butt-inskies can make blood pressure soar. Those innocent cat-less souls out there who think this might be an aberration, just check out the comments (I’m sure there will be several!) because cat butt-and-paw computer interference is a common problem. There are some products designed specifically to foil kitty computer damage, too, from keyboard “shields” that keep paws at bay, to software called PawSense that “detects cat typing” and catproofs the writing with a save function before too much damage is done.

Why do cats find computers so attractive? I suspect there are a couple of reasons. First, that lovely appliance gets WARM as it sits and runs. I’ve started shutting the laptop when I must leave it unattended, and still find Seren lounging on top of the closed lid, probably drawn to the heat.

It’s also an elevated perch. Yes, it IS! I mean, when a cat considers sitting on a flat piece of paper to be the epitome of luxury, the inch or two boost from perching atop your keyboard must make him feel like a king.

Finally, cats recognize that their humans spend lots of time (hours, days, weeks…) sitting and staring and doing finger-clacking noises on the laptop. It smells like their favorite person, AND if they sit on the keyboard they get in between the screen and your face–in your line of vision. I can just hear Seren thinking, “Why stare at that when you can be gazing with adoration at ME?…oh, and scratch that spot, you know the one. . .”

Do your cats sit on the keyboard? How do you manage the problem? What about following the mouse on the screen? Have you had any computer cat-tastrophes?


Amy Shojai is a certified animal behavior consultant, vet tech and author of dozens of pet care books. She blogs about cats, dogs, THRILLERS WITH BITE and shiny objects at her BLING, BITCHES & BLOOD blog. You can find out more about her 26 award-winning pet care books at www.SHOJAI.com where you can subscribe to her quarterly Pet Peeves newsletter to stay up to date on pet-centric information. For a daily dose of Amy, follow her on and connect on

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