This post is the first of a series I’ll be doing about money. I’ve still got a lot to learn about money–money can be one of our greatest teachers in life–but I’ve also come a long way from where I’ve started, and I thought I’d share a little of what I’m learning with you all.

I’ll talk a lot about value and wealth in this series, and what they really mean.

But let me be clear. I’m not talking about redefining “value” or “wealth” so we can realize we’ve already got it–so we can realize money isn’t that important. We’ve all heard that before. I’m talking about money. Dough, bucks, Benjamins, cash.

But more than that. I’m talking about value in the sense of worth and worthiness. I’ll be coming at this from a mental, emotional and spiritual angle.

Why? Because what we have in our lives reflects what we believe we can have–what we believe we deserve and what we believe is possible. It reflects what we’ve learned how to have.

Why do so many lottery winners let all their winnings run right through their fingers, or lose them in poor investing strategies, to wind up right back where they started?

Why do people like Donald Trump become millionaires all over again, even after winding up broke?

This isn’t luck. There’s something else going on here. There’s something inside each of us that determines what we have. Of course, there are other things at play, like socio-economic factors–for instance, being raised in a low-income neighborhood without access to the best education or nutrition could significantly impact your financial situation–both present and future. But that still comes back around to the basic point I’m making.

We learn and internalize what is possible for us. But what’s more, we have judgments about the things we do and don’t have. These judgments can box us into a way of life that isn’t conducive to growth.

I’m going to give you a little exercise. It can be a pretty revealing one. Say this out loud to someone:

Money is important.

Say it, then come back and re-read the second half of this piece.

• How did saying that make you feel?
• Were you tempted to modify the sentence? Like maybe with, “but not as important as everyone seems to think.” Or, “but not as important as love.” Or this classic–“but only for what it can bring you.”
• What emotion colored your words? Did the sentence sound bitter coming out of your mouth? Was there some resentment, or desperation? Did you feel guilty or shallow?
• Could you not say it at all?
• What reaction did you get from the person you said it to? Maybe they modified your phrase, or tried to correct your thinking.

What’s the point of this exercise? This can show you how you really feel about money. You’ll also learn how the person you spoke to feels about money.

As human beings, we have a tendency to try to fit in and be like the people around us. We tend to want their approval, and to conform to status quo in order to get it. Just sayin’.

If you want more money, don’t be one of those people who says money isn’t important.

Let’s take the phrase “Money isn’t important,” and replace the word “money” with other valuable things in life:

• My spouse isn’t important.
• My career isn’t important.
• My health isn’t important.
• Having a place to live isn’t important.

If we treat our spouse like they aren’t important, how long will that person be our spouse? Not long, if they have any self respect.

If we treat our health like it isn’t important, how long does it take for us to get sick?

If we act like our job isn’t important, how long before we get fired?

See where I’m going with this?

Money is important.

Money doesn’t like to hang around people who don’t appreciate it. Money has a lot of self respect. It knows what it’s worth.

Yes, money is important for what it can bring us. But it’s important in and of itself, too. Abundance manifests in many ways in our lives, this is true. But money is abundance in its rawest form.

Learning to treat money with respect, learning to love it and work with it, to manage it, not to fear it–all this can teach us how to make good things flow in every other area of our lives. It can help us blossom into fuller versions of ourselves.

Money doesn’t make us bad or make us good. It gives us the opportunity to be more what we already are. (I’m sure someone else said that before me… anybody know who?)

Spend time with money. Find ways to earn more of it. Balance your checkbook. Learn to save it and respect it. Learn to invest it and make it grow. Budget. Don’t be frivolous, unless you have a budget for frivolous purchases. Give some money away. Money is one of the pillars of your livelihood, like health and love and a home.

Learn to say, with sincerity and without guilt, “Money is important.”

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L. Marrick is a historical fantasy writer and freelance copywriter. She waxes poetic about swords and the Renaissance Faire at her author blog. She looks all professional-like at her copywriting site. She eats too much chocolate and still doesn’t believe downward dog is supposed to be a restful yoga pose. You can connect with her at either of her websites.